24 January 2009

Not so magical or mystical, just me

I'm so tired of being home all the time. I feel like I'm a burden to my parents, they never say it cuz they know I'm trying really hard to find a job and all, but I feel that way all the same. My parents are wonderful people and should be given a reward for all the stuff my brothers and I put them through. And no, we're not like serial killers or anything but I'm sure parenting is difficult and I know it's going to be hard when I have my kids in the future to keep them out of trouble.

As most of you know, I've been looking for a job for over a year now and nothing has really worked out except my 4-8 hours a week at the Disney Store because they don't want to fire anybody so that's all we can get per week. I've tried all these online searches and gone into a ton of stores and I guess it's because of this economy that nobody is hiring but still. And no, I will not work at McDonald's or any such place just because I don't want to be miserable at work either. I'm not looking for something glamorous but the last time I worked somewhere where I wasn't happy it didn't end well so I won't put myself through that again. I miss being able to go out whenever I wanted because I had the money to do so and could pay for the gas I used.

I'm tired of having so many numbers in my phone that I can't use anymore because the friends I used to have don't care anymore. Makes me feel a little insignificant. I have a few true friends so that definitely counts for something.

Oh that's another thing! I'm tired of my so-called friends using me for stuff and only talking to me when they have questions about certain things, it's annoying and shows me that they really truly don't give a darn about me anymore, so don't text me or call me if all you want is to get something from me. Not cool.

Sorry for the rant, I've just had a lot of things on my mind and tons of pressure from all sides, both intended and unintended, and I needed to let out some steam about it.


  1. *HUG* I'm sorry you're having a hard time. =/ If i knew of any jobs, I would definitely let you know. And I'm sorry if you feel like I've ever taken advantage of you. I haven't meant to if I did. I know how bad it feels. =/ If you need anything, just call or text me, and I'll see what I can do to help, whether it's just a friendly ear to listen to you or whatever. :)

  2. Thanks Courtney, and no you haven't ever taken advantage of me so it's cool ;)


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